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Finessing How You Communicate

Part 1


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We have to move beyond accidental living. When we first meet up with someone new and are trying to build a friendship or relationship, we make sure we cover all of our bases when communicating.

When a couple first gets together they are connecting effectively in all sensory modes. For instance, think about your own dating experience. To make a deeper connection with that person, you automatically break out of using only your primary communication strategy (visual, auditory or kinesthetic/touch.)

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Both of you look at each other often, the visual. You show the other person how you care with cards, dinners, movies, gifts, playing together. You can see how your date responds to you and you show them in many ways how you appreciate him or her.

You talk about your perspective of the world and people, as you talk your auditory sense is stimulated, you work at hearing who the other person is and you listen to them and discuss what they believe. You like the sound of that person’s voice and you find the tone matches with what you find exciting and attractive. You are trying to discover if the other person aligns with you or not. You listen to his or her thoughts and hopes and you give plenty of verbal input to draw the other person even closer to you through this communication.

The feeling aspect; the kinesthetic experience is in an essential part of mate choosing. You want to be near your date all the time. You touch him or her as much as you can, you hold hands, you hug each other, you kiss, you give back rubs, perhaps even wrestle around a bit–and certainly late night activities are an important aspect of how well you fit together. Both of you are spending significant amount of your free time doing things with the other one. This other person is like a love drug and you want as much of them as you can get. You are rather stingy about sharing them with someone else, right?

The smell and the taste component; you often times make yourself smell good through body scents of cologne, perfume, deodorants, oils, body sprays etc. You go to places to eat so you can share the tastes; you keep your breath fresh so you taste good too.

You are hitting every one of the other person’s sensory modes as often as you possibly can–what you see, what you hear, what you feel, what you taste, what you smell–both of you are triggering every visual, auditory, kinesthetic olfactory and gustatory button of your heart’s desire.

At that point in your life you are in competition with every other person on the scene who might take that desired person away. You are working at being your absolute best because you wanted this other important person to know you really were the best choice that they could make.

Remember that the more senses engaged the deeper the impression, your success in every area is due to the textures and the tones you apply in every sense and that they can experience you through. Pay attention, the rewards will follow.

Attend to the Sensory Cues

How eloquent can you be in your communications? Richard Brinsley Sheridan in 1789 penned this phrase which I just love. He said, “Won’t you come into my garden, I would like my roses to see you.”

George Barnard Shaw said, “Life isn’t about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself!” Unfortunately many good relationships, both personal and professional, fall apart because people forget to keep hitting all those sensory buttons we mentioned a moment ago.

The things they once did to promote this significant other choosing them were laid aside. They began to take for granted parts of that relationship. We tend to go back to our own primary mode of communicating and some of the other person’s buttons don’t get energized any longer. When you pay attention to the sensory words others use, you’ll absolutely enhance your ability to build rapport and understand them on a deeper level.

(to be continued…)


Has this program caught your interest? Just can’t wait to hear the next segment? Or perhaps you’d like to download the entire program to your phone or tablet and listen during your travels? You can purchase and immediately receive this entire program as a digital download. You will receive all 8 audio segments, plus a 20 page PDF transcript! Order Now: Finessing How You Communicate

Instant Rapport Building
The Psychology Of Making An Exceptional Person-to-Person Connection Would understanding the communications that promote goodwill and the communications which turn-off others be of benefit to you? Have you ever lost a customer and wondered how to bring them back? Would knowing the drivers that motivate people to take immediate action help you? Starting today you can apply strategies that boost the connection between you and others’. Psychologist, trainer and author Dr. Larry Iverson will give you proven tactics for improving your communication, diminishing misunderstandings, and building a strong person-to-person connection.