Behavioral research has shown that 97% of the American population would rather talk than listen to others.

Through asking a series of questions when speaking or listening you have an opportunity to build a deeper level of rapport and connection. When interacting with others, you have the opportunity to gently guide the interaction into a positive experience.

In many cases it’s to your benefit to think about positive questions you could ask before you engage someone else.

Not only does asking positive focused questions apply to interacting with others, but it applies to your own internal dialogue.

If you ask yourself, “How could I have been so stupid?” your brain will give you an answer to that and stay focused on your blunder. “Well dummy it’s because you are too old/young, male/female, have too much/too little time, etc.” Your brain must answer questions–even bad ones.

Instead of “How could I have been so stupid?” why not ask, “What could I do now to take care of this?” That will assist your proactiveness and action.

Both of the previous questions fulfill every one of the 6 things listed below that all questions do. Use these criteria from now on to form better questions and become a more effective communicator.

Success Through Asking Great Questions

1. All questions focus the human mind in one direction while deleting other potential options. If you ask questions about why you are a failure–you are not going to get answers about how to succeed, you are staying focused on failing.

2. Questions focus your thinking on being either more positive or more negative–pay attention and choose to focus on positivity.

3. The type of question you ask will either open up the communication with others, or close it and make the interaction briefer.

4. Questions either focus on the details of the situation or open up ones’ perspective to more of a big picture.

5. Asking questions focuses the mind into either the past, present or future.

6. Questions have the potential to open up creativity or lessen it.

“Nature will only reveal her secrets through the process of asking questions.”
Werner Heisenberg, Quantum Physicist

Look back over the 6 things questions do, while thinking about the following 2 questions. Each of these pertains to a mistake that was made. But they are opposite in the answers you will receive.

“How could you have messed it up so badly?” versus “What can we do to get this back on track and moving forward?”

Both are focused on an issue–but illicit very different responses. Take back control of your brain and interactions by asking great questions.

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