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Surround Your Self With The Right People

00:00 / 04:12

The Practice of Happiness
The Dozen Core Components To Creating Abundant Happiness (Part 12 of 14)


(…continued from last week)

Surround Your Self With The Right People

I mentioned something about this before. Who are you choosing to be around? Are you choosing to be around motivated, excited, happy people who are going places, doing things, achieving what they want? Or are you hanging out with people who are always whining and complaining about stuff? You may say “Well the person that I’m around that’s whining at me all the time is my mother, or is my friend, or is my brother.” So?!?!

You can either help them grow, change, evolve, see a new perspective, or you can choose to get sucked into their dramas. Either way you need to spend more time with the right people, the positive, the energized, the happy people. Don’t give part-time people a full time position in your life. You still may want to spend part of your time with those people who are in distress, but don’t spend all of your time with them. Why? Because it will drag you down.

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Know your value – you have value to share. Yes, you can assist those people too, but don’t get caught up in their whirlpool. You also need to stand up for yourself. Some people will do just about anything for their own personal gain at the expense of others. Don’t let people do that to you. These people know what they’re doing and they oftentimes know they shouldn’t be doing it, but they do it anyhow because it gets them their way. So stand up for yourself, don’t let people take advantage of you, it’s not to your benefit or theirs. Do you think you’re doing them a favor when you’re letting them walk all over you? Don’t do that.

Get Past It–Don’t Hold On To Stuff

Another core tip is you need to forgive people who wronged you. Do people make mistakes? Yes. Do they behave badly? Yes. Do they sometimes say things which are hurtful? They will. Have they ever made commitments and broken them? Of course.

It’s not to your benefit to dwell on those people who may be doing something upsetting because of thoughtlessness, for their own personal gain, or just because they felt like it.

Kindness is not to be mistaken for weakness. Nor does forgiveness mean there is acceptance. We don’t need to forgive people because it is good for them, it’s because it’s good for us. Carrying around resentments, carrying around hard feelings, it’s one of those stressors that gets in your way, you want to carry less stress. Forgiveness, kindness, giving goodness back is one of the ways.

Resentment is not on the path to happiness. Remember you don’t have to forgive people because you’re weak, forgive them because you’re strong enough to know that they screw up.

Lend A Hand

Another tip is to help other people. Be of service or help to children, doing something in your community, doing something for the organization, helping somebody who’s gone through a struggle or having a tough time. When you reach out and help other people, you’re really helping yourself because that kindness enriches you and enriches them both. You really need to do what you can to live your beliefs, to live your values, to live those things that are great for you.

Be a voice of kindness, be a voice of compassion, be a voice that can help other people. You need to do what you can to make sure that it enriches the people around you because your life is improved.

The Greek philosopher Epictetus said, “Make the best use of what is in your power and take the rest as it happens.” Helping someone is within your power. Reach out your hand, give them a lift. Help them move forward.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us.” When you help someone else you’re doing something for you and for them.

(to be continued…)


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