(continued from last week…)

Tryin’ Is Lyin’

Napoleon Hill, the author of Think and Grow Rich said, “Trying is lying!”

Try is another one of those conditions we set up to help us not live fully in the present and live it fully honestly. Trying is a mental condition created by the mind that includes things like struggling and effort.

The characteristics of trying are things like: a sense of frustration, a sense of futility, oftentimes lacking of purpose, a condition of not getting satisfaction and of not getting results.

Have you ever heard the expression “Go out and try hard’? The purpose of trying is to introduce the element of sacrifice into getting something done. I have to ‘sacrifice’ something so I will ‘try’ and do this.

It makes you right, for one thing. It allows the victim position, because “I will give up that thing I love and try to get this done for you today. Well I did try didn’t I?” You have a reason why you didn’t get it done, and it replaces your guilt because you give it the good old college try.

Don’t be confused about trying and doing. When Luke Skywalker was trying to raise his X-Wing fighter out of the muck of the Dagobah Swamp, and he said, “Master I’ve tried and tried and I just don’t believe I can do this”, Yoda said, “That’s your first problem, you don’t believe it.” Then he said, “No try! Either do, or do not!”

Many times when I’m coaching someone or doing counselling, the individual will say, “I will try and get this done”.

I hand them a pencil and say, “I want you to try and drop this pencil” and they drop it.

I say, “No, I didn’t drop it, I said try and drop it”, so they hold it and they drop it again.

No. The thing is you’re either dropping the pencil or you’re not dropping the pencil. And unless somebody superglued that pencil to your fingers and it just won’t come off, you can’t ‘try’ and drop it. You’re either dropping it or you’re not dropping it. It’s a choice. You can’t ‘try’ and drop it because you have to ‘do’ something to drop it. You can’t try.

I suggest deleting the process of trying from your life.

Who cares if you try? Think about that expression of Napoleon Hill’s, ‘Trying is lying’. If you give a memo to someone and say, “I need this transcribed and I need it done by four o’clock”, and they tell you, “I’ll try and get it done by four o’clock”, what they’re basically saying is, “I’m probably not going to get this done, but I’ll tell you that I might and if I do that’s wonderful and if I don’t, well that’s too bad. And so I have all this other stuff I need to do but I might get to this and so I’ll tell you that I’ll do it – kinda – and I’ll tell you I will ‘try’ and do it but I might not get it done.” Trying is an excuse.

If someone next tells you, “I’ll try and get this done” just say, “Wait. Are you going to do it by four o’clock?”

“I’ll try to get it done.”

“No, that’s not what I said. Are you going to do it? You’re either going to do it or you’re not.”

“Yes, I will do it by four o’clock.”

“Great.”

or “No, I don’t think I’ll be able to get it done by four – probably tomorrow by ten would be more realistic.”

“Great, get it done by ten the next day.”

Trying is a way to let ourselves off the hook. Or for someone to let themselves off the hook, where they don’t have to make a full commitment, they can just ‘try’ and do it.

Trying doesn’t work. You’re either doing it or you’re not. You either believe something or you don’t. You’re either hauling your ‘stuff’ around or you’re not. It really is helpful to dump extra baggage like ‘trying’ because it only gets in the way. No try, do or do not!

We can become much more aware, more conscious and begin to move off of autopilot, into a more conscious fulfilling life because we win through making decisions about what we will and will not do. Tryin’ is lyin’.

(to be continued…)

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