Without change we’d still be forced to live in caves. (Unless of course you’ve found a cave you really like, and moved in recently.) Change results from dissatisfaction of some sort. You are tired of the old, or desirous of something new or different. Everything you see around you is the result of discontent with status quo. The light bulb, car, frozen food, nylon, water bed, on and on, are all the result of wanting something different or discontent on some level with what exists.

Yet, though we desire change, it is frequently uncomfortable when we experience it. It can be downright scary, or it can be pleasurably invigorating. It can trigger curiosity of what will happen next, or an instant desire to retreat back to what is safe. All of these experiences are normal. Socrates said, “Change is the only constant.” Though it’s expected, it still frequently creates mental upheaval.

The reason you cling to “the way you’ve always done it” is because of comfort. It’s because it feels safe. The risk or threat is at a low level.

You see, no one will take action on anything, unless the level of threat is at an acceptable level for them. What about kamikaze pilots in World War II. The level of threat was acceptable to them, or they wouldn’t fly. Sounds a bit far fetched right? Well it’s a fact.

Let’s bring it closer to home. Do you bungee jump? Why or why not? The level of risk or threat is at an acceptable or unacceptable level, so you do or do not jump. Will you sing on stage? Again, the level of exposure and the risk or threat implied will allow you to get up on stage and perform or not. This is a deeply engrained subconscious mechanism that is part of the homo sapien experience.

The most common reaction to a person experiencing change is to resist or to procrastinate. Change moves you out of your comfort zone. Pushing back is an automatic response for everyone, depending on the level of threat/comfort. This is why it is so hard to change a habit—even a strongly unwanted one like overeating or smoking—or a greatly desired one like committing to a long-term relationship or changing careers. Though we may want it, the unconscious frequently resists because it’s uncomfortable.

There is a key to making change easier. There is a first step that must be in place or change and moving out of our comfort zone will not occur. The essential fuel that fires the launching of a change is your “Reason Why”. Without a reason why little will shift. Without a reason why you will just keep doing the “same old, same old”. A reason why is the leverage you need to create the life you want.

Archimedes said “Give me a lever long enough, and a fulcrum on which to place it, and I shall move the world.” Your reason why is the lever that pry’s you out of a rut, or moves you into a new place. This lever(age) is an emotional drive. It’s a gut feeling. It does not have to do with logical thought or intelligence. It has to do with energy and passion.

When you have a strong enough reason why, very little can stop you. For example, just knowing you should quit smoking because it’s bad for you, even knowing that you can get a terminal illness from it, may not stop the habit. Only when the sense of threat is built big enough, or the sense of new health from quitting is strong enough, will someone quit. It’s the leverage.

So what do you do to get this powerful leverage to eliminate a bad habit, or to start and stick-with a new personal pattern? You create your own reason why that is strong for you. No one can do this for you. Only you can trigger this for you. It’s the equivalence of a vow you make to yourself. It’s a “gut level” commitment.

To break through the natural resistance to change you engage your mind and emotions. You mentally create two or more vivid mind movies—one of all the benefits you’ll gain from this new pattern, and the other of all you’ll lose if you don’t change to this new pattern. You mentally talk to yourself with passion and conviction like you would if you were coaching a close friend. You build up your own personal reason why until you can feel this commitment inside.

Does this sound hard? It’s not really, you just have to find the right leverage and you can truly move the world. Here’s the kicker—you have already done this countless times. You have a committed “reason why” for everything you do with consistency in your life. Being on time or doing a good job at work; raising your children in a loving encouraging environment; doing what you told someone you would do when you said you’d do it; etc.

To go through change gracefully, to overcome the normal resistance new or different, just get some leverage on yourself. When you find and apply your reason why, you’ll find a deepening sense of calm self-assurance and fulfillment. You have a more rich experience, because you become more fully in control of the only thing you really can control—you….