It’s crucial to not get hooked by frustration and anger. Frustration is wanting something and not getting what you want. Anger is because you want something and begin demanding you get your way or what you want.

Paramahansa Yogananda years ago stated, “Anger comes from thwarted desires.” This was probably the very first quote I ever memorized. Anger comes from thwarted desires.

Think about it. If you’re angry—why are you angry? It’s because you wanted something—something stopped or blocked you—and you are insisting you get your way or have what you want.

There are six steps to getting angry. This process was observed and documented by Dr. Paul Hauck, a contemporary of cognitive psychology researcher Dr. Albert Ellis.

The first step is, “I want my way.” When you want something to happen, or you want to get something and you don’t, it’s frustrating. You can want whatever you want—realizing full well that you might not get it.

The second step is “Something is stopping or blocking me from getting my way, on accident or on purpose.” You, they, it, the situation, the system, something, is stopping or blocking me. Experiencing step two is also creates frustration.

Anger begins when you move from step two into step three. And step three rapidly escalates on into step six.

Step three is a demand. It’s like you’re pounding on the table, demanding the person or situation do what you want NOW! Three is, “I must have my way!” (Notice the exclamation point?) I must have it! I must have the lollipop! (Ever see a child throw a temper tantrum?) I must have my boss agree with me and let me do it my way instead of the stupid way they always have! I must be able to do this, get this, have that person do what I want right now. This is a demand that you get your way. (

Step four is finger pointing or blaming. It’s the process of blame thinking, “You are bad or wrong for not giving me what I want!” It’s a bad thing that I’m not getting X, and you’re the reason why, or that’s the reason why. It’s a finger pointing, blaming type thinking pattern.

The fifth step is, “You, they or it deserve to be punished, because you’re not giving me what I want.” Punishment is a part of the anger process. You feel like hitting something, breaking something, yelling, swearing, kicking, threatening, giving them the silent treatment, going slow when they want you to hurry, procrastinating because it bothers them—punishing them because you aren’t getting your way.

And the sixth one is, “I’m going to punish you!” (Have you ever done any of the above list?) You may not smack them—but you feel like it. And that anger is a barrier to you managing your mind effectively.

Frustration and anger go hand in hand—frustration is the primary emotion, anger is the secondary emotion. You can get frustrated and not move into anger. But once you’ve moved into anger you’ve taken the emotional game up to an entirely new level.

If some standard, something you wanted to have happen, some person has blocked you and you are demanding that it change—get over yourself!

Go ahead and be ticked off for awhile because you didn’t get what you wanted, but catch that negative demanding thinking pattern and let it go. Move beyond it. The emotional distress of anger isn’t worth it. As research has proven, anger can ruin your health. Take care of yourself and overcome the negative thinking pattern of anger.

To learn one of the most powerful patterns for overcoming negative thinking and the anger pattern, go to www.NegativeSelfTalkEliminator.com Check it out. It works!

Your beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Dr. Henry Beecher of Harvard Medical School proved that the brain has the ability to override the effects of drugs. The power of belief is absolutely crucial to healing and health. He spent much of his career studying this and how we can make it come alive and use it to heal ourselves and have medicine work better.

One experiment that Dr. Beecher did was with 100 student volunteers. He had them take two test drugs. One drug was in a red capsule, the other was in a blue. The students were told the red capsules were a super stimulant. You take these and they’re going to wire you right up. The other drug in the blue capsules, were said to be a tranquilizer that would rapidly take you out.

Actually the truth of it was that they were reversed. The red capsule actually was a barbiturate and the blue capsule had amphetamine in it. But the interesting thing that Dr. Beecher noted was that the students reacted as they thought the pills were supposed to be, not as they actually were.

In other words, the red capsule which they had been told was a stimulant, was actually a barbiturate. They felt hyper, they felt up, their hearts rates increased, their body sensations got bigger and their brain waves got more excited.
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Most people like to think they live their lives and determine their reality based on their logic and reason. But in reality, most decisions are based on our emotions.

When it comes to a battle between the willpower and the imagination, your imagination will win hands down every time. And your imagination is ruled by memories, by visualizations and by your emotions.

A number of years ago the motivational speaker Zig Ziglar said, “People justify their purchases with logic but they buy on emotion.” How true, how true. You know, we may talk ourselves into things, but really we take action (or don’t) because of how we feel about those choices or that decision.

For instance, why do you drive the car or truck that you drive? Because it feels comfortable to you; it’s something that felt right to you.

Many will say, “Oh no, not me! I bought that car because it’s logical. Or, I need this truck for my work.” Uh-huh, right. Well, maybe you do use it for work, but it felt like the right thing to do—or you’d never have bought it.
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Ever have a problem? Stupid question, right….

Quite often the solution to the problem has nothing to do with the problem itself at all. Yes, you do need to take time to focus on the problem. Look at it from many perspectives so you thoroughly understand it. Then it’s time to shift your primary focus to the solution instead of the issue.

There are many times where the process of taking care of the problem is to quit focusing on the problem, and start putting your energy into a new path.

“That which you resist persists.” Siddhartha Gautama Buddha (563-483 BC) If all you can see is the problem, guess what—it is very likely you’ll continue to have that problem. The human mind tends to attract to us whatever we focus on most.
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A hardware store owner was the third generation to step in to his families business.

The staff worked together like a big happy family. And their customers loved to shop at the store because of the positive people, great products and the pleasant environment.

For as long as customers could remember, the owner wore a golden lapel pin that said “Business Is Great!” and he was always cheerful and great to work with Most people thought he was happy because business was great. In reality, it was the other way around.

For the most part, the business was very good. But like all businesses, there were ups and downs—prosperous times and lean times. What never changed though was the owner’s positive attitude, caring way he dealt with his customers, and the badge saying “Business Is Great!”
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There’s a mathematical principle called the Law of Requisite Variety. It says, “The element in a system with the most options, will control the system.”

For instance, let’s apply the law of requisite variety to thinking about an aspect of a car. What is the most complex part of a car, and is also the part of the car that is most likely to break down first? It’s the engine.

Why? The engine is the part of the machine with the most moving parts and the most complexity, so it has more ways things can go wrong or break down. Using the Law of Requisite Variety, the part of the system (engine) with the most options (or in the case of the car, the most ways it can break down) is the one that’s going to have the most influence over the system.

Though you can have a brake or transmission problem, the brakes and transmission are not as complex overall as is the engine, and therefore are less likely to give you problems because they have fewer ways they can break.
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Every person is in a leadership role. Even if you are a solo-preneur, you still must lead you. These ten mistakes apply to dealing with others, or managing yourself. Step-up to the challenge and eliminate them before they get in your way.

#1 Not verifying what’s of interest or priority to your team. Though you may have an agenda you desire to achieve, buy-in from your team is crucial. Be certain you don’t run rampant over what is important to them in the process of achieving your goals.
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A foreign student attending college in America, asked his grandfather from Eastern Europe to come and visit him. When grandfather arrived, the two spent the next few days seeing the town and touring the campus. On the day before his grandfather was to leave, the student asked his grandfather to meet him at the cafeteria when he finished his morning classes.

The grandfather arrived a little early and sat down at an empty table and waited for someone to take his order, but nobody did. Finally, a student with her tray of food sat down opposite him and they began to talk. She learned he was waiting for a server, so she informed him how the cafeteria worked.

“Just start out at that end of the line,” she said. “Go along the buffet and pick out what you want. At the other end they will tell you how much you have to pay.”

A few minutes later the grandson arrived. He explained why he was late, then went and got his lunch.

After a few minutes of discussion over lunch, the grandfather told his grandson, “Over the last two weeks, I have begun to understand how everything works here in America.

Life’s a cafeteria here. You can get anything you want as long as you are willing to pay the price. You can even get success here, but you will never get it if you wait for someone else to bring it to you. You have to get up and get it yourself….”

I hope you serve yourself well. Make today and every day a great day!