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Negative Self-Talk Eliminator


The Self-Blame Punisher

Part 4 of 12 from Wake Up and Win! Turn Off The Autopilot

(continued from last week…)

Letting Go of Guilt & Trying

Another piece of bad news in your life is guilt. I want you to get real clear about the meaning and the function of guilt in your life.

Guilt is a feeling which supports the position called ‘I am bad.’

‘I am bad’ is a position the mind chooses to right things with itself. Guilt is like currency that is used to pay for bad things that have been done or bad things you imagine doing or bad things that you might do if you ever got around to thinking about it. Guilt is anger turned inside on one’s self to support the position ‘I’m bad.’

Now there is a benefit to guilt. But if there were two emotions I could eradicate from the planet, one would be guilt and the other would be worry. Not that you don’t need to be concerned about things, you do, but worry is painful over-concern. Guilt is, “I’ve seen something that I don’t care for, but instead of changing it I just feel bad about it.” That doesn’t work.

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Guilt has a purpose. Guilt’s purpose is to get you to stop, slow down and pay attention. If you’ve done something or imagine doing something that’s not okay by you, and you feel guilty about that thing you did, or that thing you’re considering doing, the purpose of guilt is to get you to stop, evaluate what was done, make a decision to not do that again, to then forgive yourself for being human, then to make a decision that from that point forward you’re going to avoid living that thing you did again that made you feel guilty.

Guilt’s purpose is to get us to pay attention to what we did that’s not okay by our standards, or standards of those people around us, and then to stop, make a conscious decision that it’s something I am not going to do anymore, and once you really decide that you can then go ahead and forgive yourself, let go of it and then move on into another new moment. And you no longer need guilt.

Because you stopped, you caught the situation, you had the awareness, you made a decision about how you’re going to live from that moment forward and then you don’t need to do guilt anymore because you caught it, you did it, you understand, you move on.

Self-Blame Punisher

Guilt is not really an honest feeling or emotion – its anger turned inside at one’s self. It is a self-blaming process. Guilt happens because I am ashamed in front of myself. Embarrassment is shame before another, guilt is shame before myself.

Guilt is self-recrimination. It is you picking on you. It isn’t about helping you, it isn’t about making you feel better, it isn’t about living your life better, it is about self-recrimination. Self-blame. It is about going through that position again and again and again – ‘I’m bad’. Okay, so you’re human, you made a mistake. Gee, that’s tough. And, maybe it’s time to move on.

So look at the situation, think about it, make some decisions about how you will live in the future and commit to yourself to do that. It’s one thing to think about it, it’s a whole other to make a commitment. So think about that situation, make a commitment about your honor, your integrity, your values, your beliefs, what you believe is fair, right, just – and then live that. Move forward into that. Let that be your new day. You don’t need to beat yourself anymore with the self-directed anger of guilt. You can move beyond it because it just limits you.

(to be continued…)

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